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There’s an interesting thing that I’ve noticed when I’m working, especially with teenagers.

I’ve noticed that I can often say pretty much exactly the same thing as their closest relative has been saying to them for ages yet they’ll listen to me while they have been apparently ignoring their significant other/parent for weeks, months or even years when they say the same thing!

In fact I now tell parents about this phenomena before we start so they don’t get p*ssed off at me when their child spouts insight into their own mind that mum or dad have been telling them for weeks!

The fact is we all do this. We are surrounded by wisdom and guidance yet our chances of taking that wisdom and guidance on is heavily dependant on who it is that actually owns and dispenses that wisdom or guidance.

For me your chances of actually hearing what is being said, taking it on and actually acting on it, is simply down to associations. Basically, do you associate wisdom and knowledge with that person or are your other, possibly negative, associations to that person too significant for you to really hear it?

In a relationship for instance, especially one that’s turning pear shaped, are you able to really listen and really hear what the other person is saying? Or are you too locked in your own reality, your own decisions about what is true, that you have stopped listening or, more precisely, stopped hearing what the other person is saying?

Sometimes all the answers you need are right there in front of you but you are too busy looking everywhere else to notice them. It’s a little like finding your car keys I the first place you looked after you’ve turned the house upside down looking for them. You’d swear that they weren’t there the first time they looked and someone even said to you ‘have you looked in the place?’ And you snapped that of course you bl00dy have and yet, there they are. Right there. Had been all the time. Funny that, isn’t it?!

Sometimes you simply don’t listen to your Mammy. But maybe you should. Go and open your ears to the wisdom that surrounds you

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